I stood up when I saw my bus approach. I glanced back to see if Ryan was still standing there but he'd already left. It was funny that I hadn't even heard him leave. I stood behind the short line that had begun to form and after getting on the bus and finding a seat next to a pleasant old lady, I recounted everything that had just happened.
It wasn't that I wanted to hurt him. If anything, I was grateful to him for opening his life and heart to me so generously. Even though I'd met Ali first, he'd been a better friend – one I'd somehow come to care for. And rely on. He wasn't a bad guy and I'd meant everything I'd said to Yvette – he was a great catch. A great catch for someone who wasn't me.
The feelings that I had, the shortness of breath, the sexual attraction, the way he sometimes made me feel when I was around him... what were they really? Being in a committed relationship didn't mean that a switch got turned off and you were no longer able to be attracted to another person, after all, you were still human. It just meant you don't act on it and let it get too far.
And that was what bothered me most about the whole thing. Had I let it get too far? I must have, surely. I wasn't completely idiotic and knew that Ryan was attracted to me. I sometimes caught him looking at me the way Min Ki sometimes did and there was something about his demeanor and the way he talked to me that made it seem that his feelings for me were something above friendship. And perhaps, on some level, I'd encouraged it even though I'd repeatedly mentioned Min Ki as a deterrent. Maybe I liked the way he felt about me.
But then on the other hand, I wasn't quite sure about my feelings for him. Were they real? Or was I just being my stupid self, returning feelings simply because I felt his attraction to me? Without that, would I still be attracted or would it just be friendship? Had I fu.cked this relationship up simply because I was a dumb girl who had to like every guy that liked her back? And did that mean that I was doomed to unhappiness because for the rest of my life I'd have to deal with uncertainty just because I couldn't help but fall for any guy that smiled at me? I couldn't let that be my destiny.
And what did this mean about Min Ki and me? I had the most wonderful boyfriend a girl could dream of, yet, instead of being over the moon about seeing him again, I was unsure. No matter how hard I tried to uncross my brain to figure out exactly how I felt and why, I couldn't come up with anything coherent. As his arrival date approached, the nagging feeling seemed to strengthen and I couldn't even imagine how I'd feel after seeing him again. And if I saw him and realized that I no longer loved him, what kind of person would that make me? And if I wasn't a sadist, after proving that I'm unable to stick to a commitment even with a great guy, why would I want to embark on a relationship with another guy?
I was still contemplating joining a convent to avoid turning into some kind of heartbreaker when the old lady nudged me to excuse her so that she could walk past me. I watched her get off and as the bus pulled away, I saw her hug an equally as old man and smile lovingly at him.
I sat back in my seat and sighed. When I was younger, as I read fairytales and watched Disney movies, I fantasized about living 'happily ever after' with my prince and it scared me to think that it could never really happen for me. How can a sensible girl possibly like two guys at the same time? I wasn't normal.
Regardless of what was wrong with me, I just had to figure out a way to make my life normal again.
***
I woke up the next day scared out of my wits. As I dragged myself out of bed, I couldn't help but feel like I'd somehow been transported back to the first day of school. I was nervous, unsure of what awaited me once I walked out of my house. Since I'd decided to cut Ryan out of my life, did that mean that I was back to Square 1? I wasn't stupid so I realized that no Ryan also meant no Ali so I was mentally preparing myself to be all alone.
My morning classes passed without incident but when lunchtime rolled around, I knew that it was time to face my fears head on. As I walked into the cafeteria, I promised myself that since ditching Ryan meant that I'd have to find a way to thoroughly enjoy my own company, I'd figure out a way to do just that. I wasn't some kind of weak woman who needed friends to survive, was I?
After taking a few steps in, I looked around to see if Ali, Ryan and the rest of their friends were already seated, and it didn't take me long to find them sitting at their usual table. Ali caught my eye and when I saw that my smile was met with a glare from her, I looked away. Oddly, I wasn't hurt but maybe it was because it only seemed natural that she'd immediately take his side.
In an ideal world, I would have loved to explain everything to her but since I was still pretty confused, what exactly could I tell her? Plus, she was more of his friend than she was mine so I really didn't expect her to understand me. My eyes darted over to Ryan and when he caught them, instead of looking away or frowning, he simply smiled. And my heart froze for a second. Not because it had been particularly charming but because I felt so guilty. He liked me and I'd hurt him and yet he wasn't being a bas.tard about it. What planet was he from?
After getting my lunch of chicken salad and some bread, I walked over to a table with some faces I recognized. For a fleeting second, I'd thought of sitting with the Prada Bit.ches but considering my brother's relationship with Seung Mi had already arrived at its natural end, I couldn't imagine that I'd be welcome. Another fleeting second, I thought of sitting by myself but how would that make things normal? That would only make it look like there was something wrong.
"Do you guys mind if I sit here?" I asked as soon as I arrived at the table. Two of the girls – Nancy and Rachel– were in my math class and even though we'd yet to have philosophical discussions about Kafka, we were cordial to each other in class so I hoped that they'd be the same outside of class.
"Sure," one of the girls I didn't know said. "We're talking about Di.ck In A Box," she said, giggling.
I raised my brow and sat down. "Di.ck In A Box?" I repeated.
Nancy laughed and nodded. "Yeah, Di.ck In A Box. With Justin Timberlake. Haven't you heard it?"
***
My modified life had already begun to settle into a routine. It was amazing how the mind worked. After deciding that I no longer wanted to see Ryan, I really wasn't seeing him. Even in the classes we were both in, I noticed than other than acknowledging him at the beginning of class, I promptly forgot about him. So outside of studying, watching television and transforming myself into someone who had lunch with different groups of people everyday, I barely had time to think about my screwed up romantic life. But when the lights were off and I tossed and turned, trying to get to sleep, all I could think about was my mother.
"You have to talk to her," Min Ki said from the other end of the phone line.
It was a little over a week since I'd had a real conversation with my mother. Other than saying "Hello," I had nothing else to say. I just couldn't believe how cruel and selfish she was being. If her patients were dying, and she was the only person on the planet who could save them, it would make sense. But the way it was, with her staying back because she could be a doctor and using my father as an excuse, infuriated me.
"What is there to talk about? She doesn't want to come back. I can't force her," I reminded him.
"Do you want me to go and see her? She's staying at your house, right?"
"No." It wasn't the first time he'd suggested it and even though it was sweet, I knew it wouldn't work. "She'll probably get mad. Do you think they are going to get a divorce?"
"She said she's not, didn't she?" he said softly.
"But what she said doesn't make sense. There has to be a more logical reason."
"Have you talked to your father about it?"
"What do you mean?"
"I don't know, asked him if he agreed to this or why he acts differently when she was around, or if he wants a divorce?"
I grunted. Even though my father was still being nice to us, cooking and telling silly stories, we still weren't entirely comfortable with him. It just meant that we'd become used to walking as if on egg shells and since my brother and I were enjoying our newly-found freedom, it also meant that we weren't going to do anything to try to jeapardize it. There was still something artificial about it and asking him a question that might infuriate him had the potential to change things back to the way they once were. And I certainly didn't want that.
"The next time your mother calls, try to talk to her. Try to understand her. She's been your mother for almost seventeen years and in all that time, has she ever tried to hurt you?"
I grudgingly said that she hadn't.
"So talk to her. And when you do, try to listen. Don't just jump into conclusions and assume that she's just looking for an excuse to be away from you. When someone loves you, do you know how hard it is to be away from you?" he said in his flirtatious voice.
I laughed. "Whatever, Oppa."
"I'm dead serious. Maybe it's a little different for you because you left so everything is different but for me, it's almost as if a part of me is gone."
I hissed. "Stop exaggerating."
"I'm being very serious." And he sounded it. "When you left, I still attended the same school, wore the same clothes, lived in the same house but something was missing. It was like you'd taken a part of me with you. Imagine losing your arm, or your leg or your sight. A part of you is gone and you will always miss it. Even if you get used to it and figure out a way to live your life regardless --maybe with the help of crutches or an artificial arm-- you still won't be the same. Because you're not whole. Do you understand what I mean?"
I thought back to how I'd been the last few weeks and sincerely hoped that he was wrong. If you couldn't get used to the new you so much that you didn't miss the old version of yourself, how could a person truly move on? But I could tell that he really wanted me to agree with him, so I did.
"But in a little over a week, I think I might feel more whole. Not completely, but being closer to you should help."
***
Another week passed and just as I was really getting used to being the social butterfly that was making friends with everyone in my year, I got a reminder email in my inbox. Apparently, the results of the Zoetrope short film contest were about to be released and I'd put it on my calendar. Of course, that only brought back memories of walking down the streets of Virginia and D.C. laughing and filming, of me writing lyrics and singing as Ryan played the keyboards. Getting that email really didn't help in my quest for a different me, and even though I was quite sure that we hadn't placed in the contest, I couldn't help but hold onto a glimmer of hope.
So shortly after school closed, instead of being a good girl and heading back home, I decided to go and check the results. I walked into the building and when I was looking around, trying to figure out where the blasted thing would be posted, my eyes fell on a back that I immediately recognized as Ryan's.
Unintentionally, I stayed rooted in the spot and could already feel my heart beating faster. It only made sense that he'd also be curious about the film, after all, he'd made the darned thing. But it annoyed me that even though I'd thought of him, I hadn't really thought of him and the high likelihood that he, too, would show up at the Institute. If I'd considered it, I would have shown up another day instead of risking running into him like that.
"Miss, are you going in or not?" an irritated voice said from behind me. I quickly stepped aside and apologized to the man for blocking his way. Then I straightened my back and walked over to the board. Even though I'd considered turning around and leaving, I decided that I wasn't a coward and just because we couldn't be friends didn't mean that he no longer ceased to exist. So, of course, we'd run into each other once in a while. It wasn't a big deal. And I could handle it.
As I approached the board, the other people standing there left so he was the only one still standing there when I finally reached it. Even though I didn't want to, I couldn't help myself so before looking to see if that was where the results were posted, I glanced at him and saw that he had a very dreamy and silly look on his face.
Something about that tickled and excited me so I quickly looked around the posted notes till I found the one announcing the results. And there in third place read, "Boomerang by Ryan Cho." I didn't even know that he'd changed the title.
As if I'd suddenly been kicked in the gut, I doubled over to catch my breath. What the hell? My face was going to be seen by Francis Ford Coppola? We'd won? Okay, not won but we'd placed?!?! How? My braincells were working at a million miles a minute. And quickly, the feelings of disbelief were being replaced by joy. We'd done it! Ryan was not a quack! WOW!
I felt Ryan stir beside me and heard him gasp as if he'd only just realized that I was there. As I was getting up, I heard someone from behind us ask, "Are you Ryan Cho?"
Happier than I'd been in weeks, I turned around to find an older man looking at him curiously. Then he looked at me then broke into a smile. "Yes, you must be Ryan Cho! And that's your beautiful actress," he said, walking over to me and shaking my hand. "What's your name?" After I told him, he said, "My name is Alfred Banes and I was one of the judges for this competition. Congratulations."
Ryan shook his hand vehemently and thanked him. It was quite obvious that he, too, couldn't believe it. I wanted to pat his back and tell him that I'd always believed in him but the man began to talk. He expressed how much he enjoyed our film then suddenly, he moved much closer to us and said, "You want to know the funniest thing?"
Ryan nodded and subtly stepped back. From where I was standing, I couldn't tell if the man had funky breath but really, he'd been standing for too close for a stranger.
"One of the judges was adamant that it was the same old cliché story about immigrating to America in the search for the promised land but I knew better," he said proudly.
Ryan glanced at me and I glanced back and hid a smile. I found it funny that the first time we were really acknowledging each other that day was to share a secret look.
"That film was about puberty, and adulthood," he continued. "Children are always eager to grow up, constantly rushing. You can see from the way they talk, dress, act… you know?"
We both nodded.
"I loved how you showed the evolution. The first ounce of freedom a child gets and how liberated and adult he or she feels. She runs around, pleased with herself, happy and content about how lovely it is to be able to make decisions for herself. Then one day, something happens. It doesn't have to be something catastrophic or even particularly horrendous. The littlest thing can change the balance of one's life. I really loved how you were subtle about this turning point. We really couldn't see it but we knew it was awful. Then after the initial shock and despair," he turned to me, "which you depicted beautifully, by the way, she tries to go back to her normal self. But of course, it's not the same. She's no longer naïve about what life's really like. I loved how you showed the inner turmoil and especially how her shirt changed repeatedly to emphasize this struggle. You really did a lot with a small budget. Then, of course, at the end of the day, this teenager decides that maybe it's not yet time to be an adult and willingly goes back home to seek solace with her parents. That way, she can be happy as a child for a little longer." He clapped. "Bravo!"
***
My chest was bursting with pride and joy and five minutes later, when the judge had finally tired of talking and released us, and we walked out of the building, I could no longer hold it in. So I turned around and jumped on Ryan with all my might. It was a mere fluke but I was still ecstatic. "Oh my God, we did it!" I said as I fell into his arms. And I don't know what it was but before I knew it, we were kissing.
Chapter 31
As soon as I realized what I was doing, I pushed Ryan off me. "What the fu.ck do you think you're doing?" I yelled before wiping my lips furiously to get rid of the taste of him. He tasted just like his smelled, minus the sweat, and having that in my mouth was unsettling. I wiped my lips one last time then backed away from him. "What did you do that for?"
He looked at me like I was crazy. "What did I do? You kissed me first!"
"I didn't...," I started to protest but stopped. I eyed him from the corner of my eye then walked over and sat on the first step.
I placed my elbows on my lap and rested my head in my upturned palms.
The truth was; he was right. I had kissed him first. I glanced at him standing at the other side of the staircase staring down at me then looked away again.
I thought back to what had happened a few moments earlier. After walking out of the building, in excitement, I'd jumped on him and after getting over the initial shock, he held onto me and twirled me around.
I laughed, not just because I was practically floating in the air but also because I was sharing in the joy of having our film somehow place in the competition. Yes, the judges absolutely missed the point and the film had never really been about puberty, the growth process of transitioning from childhood to adulthood and whatever else. It was supposed to be a narrative about immigration and even though we were winning because the crazy judge had read way more into it that we'd planned, we were still ecstatic. At least, I was.
So when I jumped into Ryan's arms and he hugged me back and I felt his body pressing against mine in a way it never had, and I thought about how much I'd thought about him in past few days, I felt this sudden intense urge to be closer to him.
It wasn't planned, after all, other than a few fleeting thoughts, kissing him wasn't something I'd spent several nights dreaming about. Plus it certainly didn't help that I was no kissing expert so almost all I knew about kissing was what I saw on television. But I still wanted to kiss him... in a way I'd never kissed Min Ki Oppa.
So as gravity took over and my body slid against his, my nose quickly rubbing against face till I landed on my feet, that feeling grew more intense. And when my feet were firmly on the ground and my arms still wrapped around him, I reached up and kissed him.
He must have been shocked because his body stiffened but it didn't take long for him to kiss me back.
He pressed his lips against mine and I did the same. Were there supposed to be fireworks? I didn't know. I wasn't even sure if the sensations I felt against my lips were pleasurable but I just knew that it felt nice to feel so close to him. But when the little kisses progressed and it felt right to part my lips, an alarm bell went off in my head. What was I doing? And that was when I regained my senses and pushed him off.
"Why are sitting there quietly? Don't you have anything to say?" he asked, his voice much deeper than I'd ever heard.
I turned to him and shook my head. The look of bewilderment on his face was so intense, so exaggerated, that I couldn't help but laugh. So I did. At first, it started off as a slight chuckle then I looked away and chuckled a bit more. But something compelled me to glance at him again and when I saw that the look had intensified, and he'd begun to look like a crazed cartoon character, I tossed my head back and burst into loud, boisterous laughter. I put my hand on my now aching tummy and laughed and kept laughing till my eyes got teary.
"What the fu.ck?" he cursed.
And that just killed me. Even if I'd planned to stop laughing, it sure wasn't going to be anytime soon. "I'm okay," I managed to say between fits of laughter-induced madness.
***
"Are you okay?" Ryan asked a few minutes later.
I nodded.
"What was so funny?"
I giggled then stopped. I tilted my head to him. "You know I'm a mess, right?"
He raised his brow. "You are?" he asked, still confused.
I nodded. "I sure am." I sat up straight. "That was why I laughed," I said matter-of-factly. Even though Ryan's expression had been the drop of water that tipped the bucket, so to speak, laughing was just a way of letting go of all the tension that had built up inside me for the past days. The other option would have been to cry and I was glad that my body hadn't chosen to go that way. I really don't know what I'd have done if I'd cried in front of him.
"But I feel better. Sorry about the kiss," I said, holding onto the railing and pushing myself up. As I slapped my buttocks to rid my pants of any dirt, Ryan also stood up.
He took hold of my hand and made me look at him. Nervous, I sucked in some breath when I saw how serious he looked.
"Why did you kiss me?" he asked, looking directly into my eyes.
I sighed then averted my gaze. "I'm a mess, remember? There were too many things going on in my head."
I expected him to ask me to expatiate but he didn't. Instead, he let go of my hand but kept his lips together. Thirty seconds later, we were on the pavement, walking against traffic. Since we were already at the tail end of winter, I could already tell that the days had begun to get longer as the sun hadn't yet set. I raised my hand to shield my face from its glare.
"Nothing has changed, right?" Ryan asked about a minute into our walk.
I stopped walking and shook my head. "I'm so sorry. And I really wish I wasn't involving you in all my drama. You don't know how sorry I am."
"Again with the apologies. You still love your boyfriend," he stated, still walking.
"Yes," I said in a small voice. I had no choice but to keep walking so I picked up my feet and caught up with him. "Yes," I repeated and as I said it, I felt a pang of regret. Did kissing Ryan mean that I'd cheated on Min Ki? Not only had I wronged Ryan by leading him on, I'd also betrayed my boyfriend in one fell swoop.
"I'm a really bad girlfriend," I thought aloud.
"Really? Even though you say you're confused, I never once thought you'd leave him for me."
"Really?"
He laughed. "You need to chill," he said, putting his hands in his pockets. "Yes, I like you but it's not like we are Romeo and Juliet and it's a matter of life and death. It doesn't have to be so dramatic - it's really not that deep. You really have to chill out and stop stressing about everything so much."
I smiled, jealous of his easy attitude. Maybe if I were more like him, I wouldn't be in such a dilemma. "I really wish it were so simple. I guess if I knew why I was having these feelings, they'd be easy to sort out, you know. When we were in Seoul, everything was so simple. Never once did my feelings shake and I never looked at another guy. So why now? Why do I feel this way? Is something wrong with me?"
He shrugged. "You're having these feelings because you're 16. It's no big deal. I bet you don't even know why you think you like me."
I nodded slowly. "Yeah, I guess I just have to figure things out."
We got to the end of the road and joined the other people waiting for the walk sign to change.
"When I figure everything out, I'm sure it'll be fine."
"What's there to figure out? Ultimately, you love your boyfriend and you want to be with him. You should focus on that."
He was right. But that didn't really change much. "So while I'm still trying to figure things out, you won't be mad that I still think we shouldn't be apart? From your reaction the other day, I feel like I upset you."
The light changed so we joined the rest of the crowd crossing the street. I asked him if he'd brought his car and he said he'd packed it near the subway station I was walking to. When we were safely at the other side of the road, I resumed our discussion. "You're not mad that we can't be friends?"
"I honestly don't see why we can't be friends because I definitely won't pounce on you unless you're scared that you'll pounce on me." He raised his brow but I could tell he was only half-joking.
When I rolled my eyes in an attempt to hide my embarrassment, he laughed.
"But," he continued, "back to your question. Why would I be mad? Do you really think that it's so hard to be away from you?" He snorted and hissed. "It'll be a breeze. Don't worry about it."
I smiled as I thought of what Min Ki had said on the same subject and how he'd claimed that it was difficult for people to stay away from me. It wasn't like I was some hot seductress but from the way Ryan was acting, like he was no longer bothered that I'd severed our friendship, I wondered if he really did like me. Or maybe, just like I had, he'd also become confused by our closeness and mistaken it for something else. Maybe that was why after some time had passed, he was taking everything in stride. Could that be the difference between my two relationships?
While one was solely about love, the other was about friendship. And no matter what happened and how confused we got, at the end of the day, underneath it all, our relationships never really changed.
He looked at me like I was crazy. "What did I do? You kissed me first!"
"I didn't...," I started to protest but stopped. I eyed him from the corner of my eye then walked over and sat on the first step.
I placed my elbows on my lap and rested my head in my upturned palms.
The truth was; he was right. I had kissed him first. I glanced at him standing at the other side of the staircase staring down at me then looked away again.
I thought back to what had happened a few moments earlier. After walking out of the building, in excitement, I'd jumped on him and after getting over the initial shock, he held onto me and twirled me around.
I laughed, not just because I was practically floating in the air but also because I was sharing in the joy of having our film somehow place in the competition. Yes, the judges absolutely missed the point and the film had never really been about puberty, the growth process of transitioning from childhood to adulthood and whatever else. It was supposed to be a narrative about immigration and even though we were winning because the crazy judge had read way more into it that we'd planned, we were still ecstatic. At least, I was.
So when I jumped into Ryan's arms and he hugged me back and I felt his body pressing against mine in a way it never had, and I thought about how much I'd thought about him in past few days, I felt this sudden intense urge to be closer to him.
It wasn't planned, after all, other than a few fleeting thoughts, kissing him wasn't something I'd spent several nights dreaming about. Plus it certainly didn't help that I was no kissing expert so almost all I knew about kissing was what I saw on television. But I still wanted to kiss him... in a way I'd never kissed Min Ki Oppa.
So as gravity took over and my body slid against his, my nose quickly rubbing against face till I landed on my feet, that feeling grew more intense. And when my feet were firmly on the ground and my arms still wrapped around him, I reached up and kissed him.
He must have been shocked because his body stiffened but it didn't take long for him to kiss me back.
He pressed his lips against mine and I did the same. Were there supposed to be fireworks? I didn't know. I wasn't even sure if the sensations I felt against my lips were pleasurable but I just knew that it felt nice to feel so close to him. But when the little kisses progressed and it felt right to part my lips, an alarm bell went off in my head. What was I doing? And that was when I regained my senses and pushed him off.
"Why are sitting there quietly? Don't you have anything to say?" he asked, his voice much deeper than I'd ever heard.
I turned to him and shook my head. The look of bewilderment on his face was so intense, so exaggerated, that I couldn't help but laugh. So I did. At first, it started off as a slight chuckle then I looked away and chuckled a bit more. But something compelled me to glance at him again and when I saw that the look had intensified, and he'd begun to look like a crazed cartoon character, I tossed my head back and burst into loud, boisterous laughter. I put my hand on my now aching tummy and laughed and kept laughing till my eyes got teary.
"What the fu.ck?" he cursed.
And that just killed me. Even if I'd planned to stop laughing, it sure wasn't going to be anytime soon. "I'm okay," I managed to say between fits of laughter-induced madness.
***
"Are you okay?" Ryan asked a few minutes later.
I nodded.
"What was so funny?"
I giggled then stopped. I tilted my head to him. "You know I'm a mess, right?"
He raised his brow. "You are?" he asked, still confused.
I nodded. "I sure am." I sat up straight. "That was why I laughed," I said matter-of-factly. Even though Ryan's expression had been the drop of water that tipped the bucket, so to speak, laughing was just a way of letting go of all the tension that had built up inside me for the past days. The other option would have been to cry and I was glad that my body hadn't chosen to go that way. I really don't know what I'd have done if I'd cried in front of him.
"But I feel better. Sorry about the kiss," I said, holding onto the railing and pushing myself up. As I slapped my buttocks to rid my pants of any dirt, Ryan also stood up.
He took hold of my hand and made me look at him. Nervous, I sucked in some breath when I saw how serious he looked.
"Why did you kiss me?" he asked, looking directly into my eyes.
I sighed then averted my gaze. "I'm a mess, remember? There were too many things going on in my head."
I expected him to ask me to expatiate but he didn't. Instead, he let go of my hand but kept his lips together. Thirty seconds later, we were on the pavement, walking against traffic. Since we were already at the tail end of winter, I could already tell that the days had begun to get longer as the sun hadn't yet set. I raised my hand to shield my face from its glare.
"Nothing has changed, right?" Ryan asked about a minute into our walk.
I stopped walking and shook my head. "I'm so sorry. And I really wish I wasn't involving you in all my drama. You don't know how sorry I am."
"Again with the apologies. You still love your boyfriend," he stated, still walking.
"Yes," I said in a small voice. I had no choice but to keep walking so I picked up my feet and caught up with him. "Yes," I repeated and as I said it, I felt a pang of regret. Did kissing Ryan mean that I'd cheated on Min Ki? Not only had I wronged Ryan by leading him on, I'd also betrayed my boyfriend in one fell swoop.
"I'm a really bad girlfriend," I thought aloud.
"Really? Even though you say you're confused, I never once thought you'd leave him for me."
"Really?"
He laughed. "You need to chill," he said, putting his hands in his pockets. "Yes, I like you but it's not like we are Romeo and Juliet and it's a matter of life and death. It doesn't have to be so dramatic - it's really not that deep. You really have to chill out and stop stressing about everything so much."
I smiled, jealous of his easy attitude. Maybe if I were more like him, I wouldn't be in such a dilemma. "I really wish it were so simple. I guess if I knew why I was having these feelings, they'd be easy to sort out, you know. When we were in Seoul, everything was so simple. Never once did my feelings shake and I never looked at another guy. So why now? Why do I feel this way? Is something wrong with me?"
He shrugged. "You're having these feelings because you're 16. It's no big deal. I bet you don't even know why you think you like me."
I nodded slowly. "Yeah, I guess I just have to figure things out."
We got to the end of the road and joined the other people waiting for the walk sign to change.
"When I figure everything out, I'm sure it'll be fine."
"What's there to figure out? Ultimately, you love your boyfriend and you want to be with him. You should focus on that."
He was right. But that didn't really change much. "So while I'm still trying to figure things out, you won't be mad that I still think we shouldn't be apart? From your reaction the other day, I feel like I upset you."
The light changed so we joined the rest of the crowd crossing the street. I asked him if he'd brought his car and he said he'd packed it near the subway station I was walking to. When we were safely at the other side of the road, I resumed our discussion. "You're not mad that we can't be friends?"
"I honestly don't see why we can't be friends because I definitely won't pounce on you unless you're scared that you'll pounce on me." He raised his brow but I could tell he was only half-joking.
When I rolled my eyes in an attempt to hide my embarrassment, he laughed.
"But," he continued, "back to your question. Why would I be mad? Do you really think that it's so hard to be away from you?" He snorted and hissed. "It'll be a breeze. Don't worry about it."
I smiled as I thought of what Min Ki had said on the same subject and how he'd claimed that it was difficult for people to stay away from me. It wasn't like I was some hot seductress but from the way Ryan was acting, like he was no longer bothered that I'd severed our friendship, I wondered if he really did like me. Or maybe, just like I had, he'd also become confused by our closeness and mistaken it for something else. Maybe that was why after some time had passed, he was taking everything in stride. Could that be the difference between my two relationships?
While one was solely about love, the other was about friendship. And no matter what happened and how confused we got, at the end of the day, underneath it all, our relationships never really changed.
Chapter 32
"How was school today?" my father asked. He'd been swamped at work and since my brother and I were also busy studying for our midterms, we were having pizza for dinner.
I put down the slice of sausage pizza in the hand, cleared my throat and turned to him. "Appa, when is Umma coming back?" My hands had begun to shake so I hid them on my lap.
I'd been planning to have this conversation with him for a while but every time I tried, I chickened out. So I'd given myself a deadline – the day of Min Ki's arrival – and it had finally rolled around. Something about him now being in the same country as me gave me strength.
"Su Jin ah—"
"I'm surprised you care," my brother said, turning to me. "You barely talk to her."
I ignored his statement. It wasn't that I didn't want to speak to her but the only thing I wanted to talk about was when she was coming back home. And she still didn't have a definite answer so we had nothing else to say to one another.
"Appa, are you getting a divorce?" I asked.
"No." He reached for another slice of pizza. "How can you think that? It's not the first time your mother and I have been separated, is it? And we're still married. She just needs to work things out."
"Things like what?" my brother asked coldly.
My father looked a little surprised by his tone. He turned to him and in a calm voice, said, "I don't know."
"Why don't you know? I know. Su Jin knows," my brother said, pointing at me. "It's all your fault."
My father narrowed his eyes. "What?"
"If you treated her like a human being, would she be halfway across the world hiding away from her family?"
"Stop talking rubbish. She's not hiding."
"Yes, she is. If you treated her like a person, she wouldn't do this! What kind of man are you?"
"Op—" I started to say before my brother's hard look shut me up.
"She spent so many years raising us with no help from you," Dong Won continued, "and when you finally decide that it's time to pay attention to your family, you act like she's beneath you! How can you call yourself a man?"
"Watch your tone!"
"Why? Why should I watch my tone? Who do you think you are? What are you going to do?" my brother threw his napkin across the table in anger. "What are you going to do? Tell me! Are you going to send me away like you did her?"
"You obviously have no idea of what you're talking about!" my father yelled back.
"I know exactly what I'm talking about. Just because you've decided to start acting nice doesn't mean that I've forgotten everything!"
I began to say something but my father's voice drowned me out. Then my brother replied in kind and when I saw that they were about to engage in a shouting match, I left them to it.
***
"Jinnie!" a voice said the moment I answered the phone. He'd promised to call the second he got settled in at his new home.
"Oppa. How was your flight?"
"It was good. But do you know what's even better?"
"What?" I laughed. From his tone, I could tell that he was about to say something really cheesy.
"Your voice. It feels so good to hear your voice. Even though it's still over the phone, it feels different, you know? Maybe it's because we are breathing the same air?"
"We're not exactly breathing the same air. You're like thousands of miles away from me."
"But it's still the same country. What time is it over there?"
I looked at my watch. "Like 8:15. What about you?"
"I'm two hours behind. Wow, I really can't believe I'm here. After all the planning, working all those hours, filing out all those applications, I'm finally here. It feels surreal."
I exhaled to loosen the knot in my chest. "I know." It was hard to believe that he was really here.
"But believe me when I say that America isn't what I thought it would be."
"Meaning?"
"I mean that after we landed, we drove for miles and miles and all I saw were trees. It was like I was in a kid's movie and we were driving through a magical kingdom."
I chuckled.
"And the school is nice and big but a serial killer could easily bury a million bodies here and no one would ever know because all I see are shrubs and trees. And a lot of grass and rocks. And let's not even talk about the squirrels everywhere. I think there are more squirrels over here than there are people in the entire country." He sighed. "I really feel like I'm on an episode of Natural Geographic. I actually jumped when I saw the first one – I thought it was going to attack me."
I burst out laughing. "It can't be that bad."
"Believe me, it is. When we finally got here, I wanted to turn around and run but where could I run to? It's not like there's any life outside of the school gates so if I don't die from the sheer exhaustion of running to nowhere, I bet the bears would get me."
"Bears?"
"There have to be bears or some other huge animals in there." Then his voice got softer. "But it's all worth it because you're here with me."
"You think so?" I asked myself as much as I asked him. Even though it was nice hearing him recount his first day in America, I still couldn't ignore that he'd done it all for me. And was I worth it? "You're so far away so we still won't be able to see each other."
"We'll get to see each other," he said confidently.
"Really?"
"Yes. I'm sure about it. Not today but we will eventually."
***
It turned out that Yvette didn't hold a grudge for long because one day, she called me out of the blue and since then, we'd been hanging out often.
It was about three weeks since Min Ki had arrived in the States and we'd settled into a new kind of groove.
I was hanging out with Yvette at the mall when he sent me a text message about his first hiking trip so I shared it with her.
She read it then handed the phone back to me. "So this is what it feels like to be in a long term relationship, huh?"
"I guess so. It feels pretty good. Even though we don't get to see one another very often,"
"Or at all," she interjected.
I frowned. "Or at all. We do manage to talk to each other everyday and I can really see the benefits of him coming over. You know, it's less tense and stressful… plus it's far less draining." I smacked my lips in satisfaction. "It feels pretty good."
Plus having him to talk to all the time made me feel a lot less lonely than I would have otherwise felt. Even though my brother and father were speaking, the house had become a lot more tense since their fight so I just tried to stay out of everyone's way. School wasn't much better. Ali pretty much disappeared from my life so other than some random people and Jonathan, I was pretty much alone. I did occasionally speak to Ryan but it never went further than a quick hello. I knew that I could at least try a little harder to make other friends but now that I had Min Ki with me, even though he wasn't physically around, I didn't mind my newly-found solitude.
"I can't imagine being in a relationship where I couldn't make out with the guy on a regular basis. I like to be touched, you know?" Yvette said as we stepped out of a lingerie shop. She was searching for some new bras but we couldn't find any sales for any bras that didn't look like they belonged on my grandma's grandma.
I laughed. "You're silly," I said, nudging her with my elbow.
"I'm dead serious. You don't know what you're missing out on. That's why I can't be in a long distance relationship because on one drunken day, I'd grab some guy and start making out with him. And I'm sure that won't be too good for our relationship. Plus it doesn't help that I'm not the…"
The image of me kissing Ryan on the steps flashed through my mind but I quickly shook it off.
"… Lying type. It must be hard."
"No one said that love would be easy," I said, sounding like a reality show soundbite.
She turned to me and raised her brow. "Hmm… don't take it the wrong way, but do you love him or do you just think that you love him?"
I rolled my eyes. "What kind of question is that?" Then I thought about it. "What difference does it make, though?"
She looked at me like I was completely nuts. "A lot! It makes a huge difference. Like the difference between what Shah Rukh felt for Kajol and what he felt for Rani."
I scrunched my nose. "What are you talking about now?"
"My favorite film – Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. And you'd know it if you watch it like I've been suggesting."
I sighed. She'd been trying her best to push her Bollywood stuff on me and I just wasn't having it. If Bollywood turned people into sometimes raving lunatics like she obviously was, I wanted no part of it. "What's your point?"
"I'm saying that with Rani, it was just an imagined love. She was beautiful, sexy, smart, sassy – you know, the average guy's wet dream. So Shah Rukh thought that he was in love with her. And it was nice but it wasn't real, true love. With Kajol, it was."
I knitted my brows. Why did it sound familiar? "Is this one of those stories where someone dies for love or something?"
She nodded reluctantly. "But that's not the point. You can learn a thousand lessons from Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. The point is that there's a huge difference between true love and imagined love."
I twisted my face as I thought about her words objectively. "But, from his perspective, this Shah guy thought that he loved both women, right?"
She nodded. "So?"
"So, from his perspective, they were both real love. Even if you think one wasn't real and even if you are right, to him, they were both love."
"I'm confused."
"What I'm saying is, to me, there's no difference between thinking I'm in love and being in love because for me, from my perspective," I said, hitting my chest for emphasis, "they are both love. So what difference does it make? True love or imagined love, at the time I'm experiencing it, it still feels like love to me. As far as I'm concerned, it is love. And even when I'm truly in love, I still think I'm in love, right? So they are both the same… to me."
She shook her head. "I'm so confused." When I opened my mouth to explain further, she quickly stopped me. "Enough, okay? I get it. But next time, just say that yes, you're in love."
I was about to respond to her when I heard a very distinct and familiar voice call out my name. With my heart suddenly racing, I slowly turned around to see Min Ki and my brother waving at us. My Min Ki.
I put down the slice of sausage pizza in the hand, cleared my throat and turned to him. "Appa, when is Umma coming back?" My hands had begun to shake so I hid them on my lap.
I'd been planning to have this conversation with him for a while but every time I tried, I chickened out. So I'd given myself a deadline – the day of Min Ki's arrival – and it had finally rolled around. Something about him now being in the same country as me gave me strength.
"Su Jin ah—"
"I'm surprised you care," my brother said, turning to me. "You barely talk to her."
I ignored his statement. It wasn't that I didn't want to speak to her but the only thing I wanted to talk about was when she was coming back home. And she still didn't have a definite answer so we had nothing else to say to one another.
"Appa, are you getting a divorce?" I asked.
"No." He reached for another slice of pizza. "How can you think that? It's not the first time your mother and I have been separated, is it? And we're still married. She just needs to work things out."
"Things like what?" my brother asked coldly.
My father looked a little surprised by his tone. He turned to him and in a calm voice, said, "I don't know."
"Why don't you know? I know. Su Jin knows," my brother said, pointing at me. "It's all your fault."
My father narrowed his eyes. "What?"
"If you treated her like a human being, would she be halfway across the world hiding away from her family?"
"Stop talking rubbish. She's not hiding."
"Yes, she is. If you treated her like a person, she wouldn't do this! What kind of man are you?"
"Op—" I started to say before my brother's hard look shut me up.
"She spent so many years raising us with no help from you," Dong Won continued, "and when you finally decide that it's time to pay attention to your family, you act like she's beneath you! How can you call yourself a man?"
"Watch your tone!"
"Why? Why should I watch my tone? Who do you think you are? What are you going to do?" my brother threw his napkin across the table in anger. "What are you going to do? Tell me! Are you going to send me away like you did her?"
"You obviously have no idea of what you're talking about!" my father yelled back.
"I know exactly what I'm talking about. Just because you've decided to start acting nice doesn't mean that I've forgotten everything!"
I began to say something but my father's voice drowned me out. Then my brother replied in kind and when I saw that they were about to engage in a shouting match, I left them to it.
***
"Jinnie!" a voice said the moment I answered the phone. He'd promised to call the second he got settled in at his new home.
"Oppa. How was your flight?"
"It was good. But do you know what's even better?"
"What?" I laughed. From his tone, I could tell that he was about to say something really cheesy.
"Your voice. It feels so good to hear your voice. Even though it's still over the phone, it feels different, you know? Maybe it's because we are breathing the same air?"
"We're not exactly breathing the same air. You're like thousands of miles away from me."
"But it's still the same country. What time is it over there?"
I looked at my watch. "Like 8:15. What about you?"
"I'm two hours behind. Wow, I really can't believe I'm here. After all the planning, working all those hours, filing out all those applications, I'm finally here. It feels surreal."
I exhaled to loosen the knot in my chest. "I know." It was hard to believe that he was really here.
"But believe me when I say that America isn't what I thought it would be."
"Meaning?"
"I mean that after we landed, we drove for miles and miles and all I saw were trees. It was like I was in a kid's movie and we were driving through a magical kingdom."
I chuckled.
"And the school is nice and big but a serial killer could easily bury a million bodies here and no one would ever know because all I see are shrubs and trees. And a lot of grass and rocks. And let's not even talk about the squirrels everywhere. I think there are more squirrels over here than there are people in the entire country." He sighed. "I really feel like I'm on an episode of Natural Geographic. I actually jumped when I saw the first one – I thought it was going to attack me."
I burst out laughing. "It can't be that bad."
"Believe me, it is. When we finally got here, I wanted to turn around and run but where could I run to? It's not like there's any life outside of the school gates so if I don't die from the sheer exhaustion of running to nowhere, I bet the bears would get me."
"Bears?"
"There have to be bears or some other huge animals in there." Then his voice got softer. "But it's all worth it because you're here with me."
"You think so?" I asked myself as much as I asked him. Even though it was nice hearing him recount his first day in America, I still couldn't ignore that he'd done it all for me. And was I worth it? "You're so far away so we still won't be able to see each other."
"We'll get to see each other," he said confidently.
"Really?"
"Yes. I'm sure about it. Not today but we will eventually."
***
It turned out that Yvette didn't hold a grudge for long because one day, she called me out of the blue and since then, we'd been hanging out often.
It was about three weeks since Min Ki had arrived in the States and we'd settled into a new kind of groove.
I was hanging out with Yvette at the mall when he sent me a text message about his first hiking trip so I shared it with her.
She read it then handed the phone back to me. "So this is what it feels like to be in a long term relationship, huh?"
"I guess so. It feels pretty good. Even though we don't get to see one another very often,"
"Or at all," she interjected.
I frowned. "Or at all. We do manage to talk to each other everyday and I can really see the benefits of him coming over. You know, it's less tense and stressful… plus it's far less draining." I smacked my lips in satisfaction. "It feels pretty good."
Plus having him to talk to all the time made me feel a lot less lonely than I would have otherwise felt. Even though my brother and father were speaking, the house had become a lot more tense since their fight so I just tried to stay out of everyone's way. School wasn't much better. Ali pretty much disappeared from my life so other than some random people and Jonathan, I was pretty much alone. I did occasionally speak to Ryan but it never went further than a quick hello. I knew that I could at least try a little harder to make other friends but now that I had Min Ki with me, even though he wasn't physically around, I didn't mind my newly-found solitude.
"I can't imagine being in a relationship where I couldn't make out with the guy on a regular basis. I like to be touched, you know?" Yvette said as we stepped out of a lingerie shop. She was searching for some new bras but we couldn't find any sales for any bras that didn't look like they belonged on my grandma's grandma.
I laughed. "You're silly," I said, nudging her with my elbow.
"I'm dead serious. You don't know what you're missing out on. That's why I can't be in a long distance relationship because on one drunken day, I'd grab some guy and start making out with him. And I'm sure that won't be too good for our relationship. Plus it doesn't help that I'm not the…"
The image of me kissing Ryan on the steps flashed through my mind but I quickly shook it off.
"… Lying type. It must be hard."
"No one said that love would be easy," I said, sounding like a reality show soundbite.
She turned to me and raised her brow. "Hmm… don't take it the wrong way, but do you love him or do you just think that you love him?"
I rolled my eyes. "What kind of question is that?" Then I thought about it. "What difference does it make, though?"
She looked at me like I was completely nuts. "A lot! It makes a huge difference. Like the difference between what Shah Rukh felt for Kajol and what he felt for Rani."
I scrunched my nose. "What are you talking about now?"
"My favorite film – Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. And you'd know it if you watch it like I've been suggesting."
I sighed. She'd been trying her best to push her Bollywood stuff on me and I just wasn't having it. If Bollywood turned people into sometimes raving lunatics like she obviously was, I wanted no part of it. "What's your point?"
"I'm saying that with Rani, it was just an imagined love. She was beautiful, sexy, smart, sassy – you know, the average guy's wet dream. So Shah Rukh thought that he was in love with her. And it was nice but it wasn't real, true love. With Kajol, it was."
I knitted my brows. Why did it sound familiar? "Is this one of those stories where someone dies for love or something?"
She nodded reluctantly. "But that's not the point. You can learn a thousand lessons from Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. The point is that there's a huge difference between true love and imagined love."
I twisted my face as I thought about her words objectively. "But, from his perspective, this Shah guy thought that he loved both women, right?"
She nodded. "So?"
"So, from his perspective, they were both real love. Even if you think one wasn't real and even if you are right, to him, they were both love."
"I'm confused."
"What I'm saying is, to me, there's no difference between thinking I'm in love and being in love because for me, from my perspective," I said, hitting my chest for emphasis, "they are both love. So what difference does it make? True love or imagined love, at the time I'm experiencing it, it still feels like love to me. As far as I'm concerned, it is love. And even when I'm truly in love, I still think I'm in love, right? So they are both the same… to me."
She shook her head. "I'm so confused." When I opened my mouth to explain further, she quickly stopped me. "Enough, okay? I get it. But next time, just say that yes, you're in love."
I was about to respond to her when I heard a very distinct and familiar voice call out my name. With my heart suddenly racing, I slowly turned around to see Min Ki and my brother waving at us. My Min Ki.
Chapter 33 (Part 1)
“Oppa!” I screamed, causing all the other shoppers to look at us. I stood there with my mouth wide open. If someone had hit me with a feather, I would have surely fallen down.
My heart was racing at a million beats a second and I could feel tears welling in my eyes. He looked so beautiful clad in jeans and a dark suede jacket and I could see that he’d grown his hair longer as it was now grazing the top of his eyes.
I couldn’t even move if I wanted to and just stood in the same spot, watching him walk towards me. “You’re here? How come? Where are you staying? How long are you staying?”
His face broke into a smile as he moved closer to me. “You have so many questions. How about a hug and a kiss first?”
On hearing that, I dashed towards him and he scooped me in his arms and twirled me around. I couldn’t believe how happy I felt. Min Ki Oppa was here!
After about a minute, he put me down and we just stared at each other with silly smiles. I looked at the face I hadn’t seen in what felt like twenty lifetimes and it hadn’t changed much other than looking a little gaunt. I worried that he was skipping meals but before I could vocalize that, he said, “What have you been doing in America? You’re even prettier than ever.”
“You too, Oppa. What have you been doing all this time? You’re more handsome now,” I said, grinning at the compliment. I twirled around so he could take a good look. “Everybody gains weight in America. Oppa, I’m still beautiful, aren’t I?”
He was about to say something when we heard a large barf sound. We turned to see Yvette pretending to throw up.
I laughed and walked over to her and tapped her back like I was helping her out. “Here’s my crazy friend Yvette.”
She stopped up straight and grinned. “Now I know why you’re so obsessed with him – he’s almost as hot as John Abraham.”
Min Ki raised his brow. “John Abraham?”
I laughed. “Please ignore her – she’s not well. I’m sure he’s an Indian actor. She loves those movies.”
“Oh,” he mouthed.
I laughed because he was pretending to understand even though I knew he didn’t.
Then he smiled at me. And I smiled back. And we were back to smiling at each other like two silly goofs till my brother cleared his throat.
“Yvette, why don’t we leave these two alone?”
My eyes immediately averted to the hand that was now on her wrist. I could sense trouble brewing from a mile away. I just didn’t like the look on my brother’s face. Was he bored and looking for someone to play with?
“Yvette,” I said, looking her dead in the eye. “If you’re leaving, go home alone. Don’t go anywhere with my brother – he’ll break your heart.”
“With an endorsement like that, how can I not follow him?” she said, giving him a flirty grin.
The alarm bells began to ring loudly in my head. “No, no, no, no!” I yelled before going to them and separating them. I had too few friends to risk losing one because of my brother.
Everyone but me laughed and while I was glaring at them, Dong Won said, “Min Ki flew all the way from Nowhereland to spend some time with you and you’re wasting it talk to us?” He nodded his head towards him. “Why don’t you just go with him and mind your business?”
Before I could say anything, Min Ki grabbed my hand. “He’s right. Let’s leave them alone now,” he said while dragging me away.
As he pulled me away I turned around and called to Yvette. “Better go straight home. If you know what’s good for you, don’t hang out with him!”
***
Walking side by side with Min Ki with our hands linked felt so good. His hand felt bigger and warmer than I remembered. I didn’t realize how much I’d missed him till he was standing next to me. “Where are you staying?”
“At your brother’s dorm.”
My mouth fell open again. “When did you plan this?”
“A few weeks ago. I was lucky to find a cheap ticket online.”
“Wow,” I mouthed. “I can’t believe that you and my brother managed to keep this away from me!”
He laughed. “You’re not that hard to fool,” he teased as he tapped my head like a little kid.
I frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He laughed again and pulled me close to his body. “I’m just joking.” Then suddenly stopped walking, turned to me and hugged me tightly. “I missed you so much!”
I smiled and let myself melt in his hug. Even though he’d changed his soap, he was still using his usual shampoo and that smell reminded me of the love we’d shared back home. As he hugged me tighter and tighter, I remembered all the walks we’d taken together and the first time he told me he loved me. And I felt a tear tug at my eye as I thought about how I begun to take him for granted and how I'd allowed myself to get confused for no reason. I was glad he came to remind me of just how important he was to me.
Even though we’d been in contact via phone and email, there was nothing as great as having him stand right next to me. I had so many things to tell him but right then, I just wanted to enjoy having him right next to him. I hugged him back tightly. “I missed you so much!”
“I can tell,” he said with laughter in his voice. When we finally separated, he looked down at me and said, “Seeing that smile has already made this entire trip worth it.”
I felt a little flutter in my belly.
***
“So what was all that stuff about a hiking trip?” I asked. We were back to walking in the mall holding hands.
“Which hiking trip?”
“Oppa!” I said, slapping his arm. “You really had me fooled.”
“I’m glad you love my surprise.”
“Of course I love it!” And how many girls had a guy who’d do all the things he’d done for me? I felt so lucky. And since he’d made such an effort to see me, I knew it was my duty to make sure he had a good time but I couldn’t think of any ideas. “So what do you want to do?”
“I don’t know – I just want to be with you,” he said in a sexy voice that just made me want to kiss him. So I did, right on his cheek.
He looked a little surprised but smiled back at me.
I looked away shyly then said, “But how do you want to spend the time with me? Do you just want to sit and talk? Get something to eat? See a movie?”
“Do you have a movie theatre in here?”
I nodded enthusiastically. “A great one. Let’s see a movie then,” I said pulling his arm and leading the way. There’s this—”
“Great. Watching movies hasn’t been the same without you. There’s this movie I’ve been wanting to see – the action scenes are supposed to be quite amazing.”
I scrunched my nose. “Oppa, I don’t want to watch any movie with explosions. There’s this new Kate Bosworth movie that’s supposed to be so romantic.”
He groaned. “I don’t want to fall asleep.”
“But it’ll be so romantic,” I said, pouting. "If I can't see it with you, who can I see it with?
He laughed. “Okay,” he said as we approached the movie theatre. “But you’re going to have to do whatever it takes to keep me awake.”
I stood up straight and gave him a mock salute. “Yes, sir!”
He handed me a twenty dollar note. “Go and get us some popcorn while I pick up the tickets.”
I walked away on air, remembering what it felt like to be with the one you loved. I must have been smiling like a complete idiot because when I got to the refreshments counter, the cashier looked at me like I was crazy. But I didn’t care. My Min Ki was here!
I was still floating a few minutes later when I found him standing a few feet from the ticket counter holding our tickets. He took the container holding the popcorn and drinks from me then handed me my ticket.
“We’re in theatre 12,” he said, leading the way as he followed the signs.
I was still smiling, wondering what good deed I’d recently done to deserve this when I looked at the ticket in my hand. It read: Guns, Cars and Explosions.
“Oppa, what’s this? This isn’t Kate Bosworth’s movie.”
He looked back at me. “I thought about it and there’s no need to watch a romantic movie – we can make our own romance. But I heard this movie has one of the best chase scenes in recent history.”
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